im always gonna worry about,the things that could make us cold

ARGH. I so hate stereotypes. You're good in sports,means you're probably bad in studies. You're blonde,you must be dumb.You hear metal,you must be satanic.You're quiet in class,you must be emo(lol). You attract girls even though you dont want to,you must be a flirt. You're not attached even though you can get 1 easily,you must be gay. WTF? im pissed beyond words because SOME people just seem to think that im the last two points up there.Seriously feel like just shoving my shoe to every damn person who said im a flirt.. WTF? eh please lah,its not like i go around and make every girl feel special and feel happy about it. still can ask me somemore, "if you can get the pretty girls in school to talk to you and get close to you,how come you're still single? confirm gay wan" there is absolutely no reason to remind me im not attached.. How the hell would i know?! ever thought im not attracted to them? EVER DID?! Why jealous ah you cannot get them to talk to you? Damn it how many times must say if i wanted a different person,i would get one a LONG time ago. Learn it,live it, love it. until then, you ppls can go FUCK yourself k? :D. You wanna go try and get the pretty girls in sch,go on. im not restricting anyone,i couldnt care less either. But with an attitude like that,so naive,its a wonder how you ppls will even get a girl/guy.

Ok so..im feeling mellow now so back to happy me :D.im just really upset and pissed off because its just that i dont want people to think im the flirt around because thats not who i really am. Dont ask me why im not attached. please. :( it'll just make me reminisce even more. I'll just stick to one even though i can get alot more okay? I can get alot more prettier ones with ease,thats true. but i already found a special one and i'll just stick to that okay?even though i'll probably die waiting,nothing's gonna change that :).

so cute right when i was small AHAHAHAHA :P..
ookay...romantic moment over..ok so so while writing this i remembered something funny during the chalet HAHAHA..
**5am** Hafiz: Alright guys and girls,wake up..its time!!you all know what to do.. Mari Kita Rakyat Singapura,Sama sama menuju. BAHAGIA!
all of the girls and guys sleeping: "WTH?? OI TURN OFF THE LIGHTS AND SHUT UP LAH!!"
some of the girls who're not sleeping: "hahaha everyone waking up already!!"
**morning**
Pei Xiang: eh zal,yst u mabok(drunk) sia!
me,with confidence: WHERE GOTTTTTT?!

so......im gonna get my electric guitar soon yay!! :D. not sure what to get but lets see how ah haha.my bday's coming yay!! dunno what to plan with the ppls,gonna ask them if they wanna do like chalet or smth..confirm they want :D. if they want then can invite some ppls that i really wanna invite :D :D :D :D
and my mom introduced me to this lovely song from an indo band and ive been screaming my lungs out singing this song's chorus ahaha.ITS AN ACHIEVEMENT OKAY?! I rarely sing indo/malay songs..like once per year!!haha i remember the time when i asked my malay teacher like:
me: Cikgu, Dinding is Window right?
cikgu: window?! (-_-')
others: HAHAHA say only you malay
me: typically im not exactly malay what.. so HAHAHAHA!

then everyone just shuts up LOL! me and maria are like the sotongs in malay class haha.. shes with her slang and im forever asking teacher to translate english into malay.. ahaha.
Randomness: haha my horoscope is quite funny right now..
Bottom Line: If you're looking for a new romance to start, playing 'hard to get' is not advised. (no kidding.. :/..)

Oh and this song in my blog reminds me of the old times!! its called 'dishwalla - angels or devils'.. i used to sing it quite often when i was young.. that time i found this song while watching smallville HAHA! i remember! :D.. ok this rain is making me feel sad and im starting to miss the times when i used to talk happily with uhh... :( ahh..who am i kidding.. ok la its a fact that i miss the times when things went alright with me and her...i really just wished that a miracle would happen and things will go the right way for me..this awkward silence is killing me :/.. i miss her so bad awwww :( :( :( there i said it!! maybe its just wishful thinking of my part.. :/.. after all it is hard to pick up the phone and call or get online to talk.. :(.. but still after everything i do infact miss her :( :( :( aww.. i wonder how shes doing now :/
ok la i better end this entry cuz its getting a little too long and my mom just said to me, "i regret ever introducing to you that song.. stop shouting lah..I want to sleep." HAHAHA. somehow this rain is making me feel sooooo empty :S.. rain makes ppl sad lah aiyo... rain also makes me miss ppl :( :( :( :( :( :( :(
Nite ppls!

Drunk ppl are zombies. Funny zombies.

Presenting the real meaning of the word HIGH!

"lets go changi!! to see kuih!" - gabin drunk
"COME AH I NOT SCARED AH! eh you dont kencing(pee) in the bed u know" - gabin
"gabin u drunk ah gabin"- me.. "who say im drunk?"(with utmost confidence LOL) - gabin
"i want to walk around..i cannot sleep.. i want to see kuih ah..why my head dizzy ah? what did i do ah?" 'eh fuck u lah go sleep gabin'
"hello maryjane..are you horny? you're supposed to call me half an hour ago..." - jack drunk,calling his girl (-_-)

soo im back from chalet hahaha its really fun :D!! we gotta make 1 for either our class or whoever that knows me :D being drunk makes you utterly and downright stupid HAHA.. its true! thats me,gabin and jack being drunk at the chalet HAHA.. intially i felt really heavy-hearted cause everyone just seems to be together.. Jack with phil girl named mary jane,halim with some chinese girl at his workplace named hui teng,hidhir with his chinese girl named april,louis with chelsea,farit with some malay girl etc etc.. best thing is i have nobody to talk to now because my all friends have been stolen!! :( ... so i felt that i just needed something to take me away from feeling sad and make me feel happy :).. so i turned to my long forgotten friend: Alcohol
heres some of the other clips that i recorded.. in total there we 3 people who were drunk.me,Gabin and Jack.. im the one who sounds like so smashed up and slow in the clip.. haha i sound VERY different. :) enjoy cause i know you guys will laugh when u hear this :P.. i uploaded it on imeem so just sit back and enjoy :)!!



some of the things me and gabin said,
"see ah, just now ah i see farit u know.. BUT LIKE HE GO AWAY u know.. u know anot?!"- me
"see ah, like.. ppl like me u know.. but then like.. I DONT LIKE PEOPLE U KNOW.. U KNOW ANOT?" - me
"i still want to drink!.. i seeing double u know.. 12 oclock u know..12 oclock" - gabin
"i want to sleep u know.. but i miss "people" u know..i cannot sleep u know.. like i must talk u know?!"
- me drunk



"eh how gabin.. feeling nice ah?i RECORDIIIIIIIIIIIIING!!" - me
"eh jack.. dah drunk eh? kau mabok eh? aku sikit je" - me
[translation, eh jack.. u drunk eh? u drunk issit? i abit only]
"OK GABIN BUHBYEEEEEEEE... BUHBYEEEEEEEE.BUHBYEEEEEE" - me
"aper? EH WE DRUNK WE BECOME ZOMBIE AH?eh gabin i see like two fan sial!"- me
"eh u want drink more anot?!" - me

HAHAHA.. just 6 shots of martel can make me go retarded.. omg I really cant believe i said all those things and more!! louis told me like i talked about some party at dhoby ghaut at 1pm.. LOL.. we were so noisy someone complained :S.. a few things were not on the clips but still they're damn funny..credits to the people who remembered what we blabbered :P.. being drunk is really something you need to try atleast once! ok im just being evil.. BUT! you know you're drunk but you just cant control your mouth!! all the thoughts deep inside will all spill out! serious!
"eh who got bring me makan ah?i want to walk around mcdonalds.. buy makan.. walk walk"- Gabin
"EH ARSENAL CHAMPIONS ALREADY ANOT AH?"- gabin
"i like her u know.. then ah she make me saaaaaadd... then right i feel saaaaaaaad.. then right u know anot?i still like her u know! U KNOW ANOT?!" - me (omg..)

thats me being drunk btw.. i got no idea why i took that pic.. haha..and halim said i called him at 1am just to say "eh u good ah?.... ok BUHBYEE... BUHBYEEEEE" HAHA i guess i love to say and hear that eh? lol im so retarded when im drunk.. could've taken alot more pics or called more ppls but my phone went low batt.. so sorry ah ppls :(..feel soo much better now haha.. and ever heard of ppl saying that drunk ppls look good/better when they're awake? ITS DAMN TRUE!.. i woke up with 3 girls smiling at me and cheekily laughing asking "eh you ok already? you drunk very funny leh hehehe"..so i went to wash my face and saw the mirror.. WOW! haha.. its true i tell you! i look damn good at that moment haha..felt really awkward and confused when gabin asked me when i was singing 'vulnerable' by secondhand serenade alone outside when everyone is sleeping,
"wah love song sia..who is it for?".. 'yeah haha..nobody lah just sing sing..' gabin's like, "sure anot?!".. 'yeah... ok for a girl lah'.. then he went "ahaha she sure happy one right? you sing to her".. i just got silent and went 'yeah i guess she is..'
i love this new song in my blog.. its from anberlin "dismantle. repair."
i thank a person for re-introducing them to me again haha.. the song is slow at the start but the chorus is catchy!!
Oh oh, things are gonna change now for the better
Oh oh, things are gonna change

Give me time to prove
Prove I want the rest of yours (prelude)
Call this a prelude to a lifetime of you
It's not that I hang on every word
I hang myself on what you repeat
It's not that I keep hanging on
I'm never letting go

[Chorus 2x]
Hands, like secrets, are the hardest thing to keep from you
Lines and phrases, like knives, your words can cut me through
Dismantle me down (repair)
You've dismantled me
You've dismantled me

ok emo's coming so i better go sleep before it gets to me..Nite ppls! :)

it was an honest mistake~

Sheva!! :D.. so played soccer today with Louis,Jack,Pei Xiang,Farit,Hidhir,Gabin and louis's cousin justin or smth.. hahaha.. it went WAYYYYY better than expected.. sheva's son (lol) scored 12 goals muahahahaha.. and god does it feel so damn good when u score 1 nice goal and ppl go "WOOOOOOOWWWW NICE NICE" haha.. made friends with some swiss cottage kids who were playing at pending and i gotta say those little sec 2 buggers are REALLY good.. not as good as us but still f'ing good :P.. cant wait to fight their sch team cuz next year they're in division B :).. so i was telling jack about how ppl in my office would think im chinese and speak to me in chinese at first cuz my skin if cold its VERY white.. so apparently while on the way home,buying bubble tea at BP with jack and farit,they auntie says something in chinese about "got 20 cents".. im like "eh auntie i not chinese hehe.." she laughed and both of them were like "wth?".. haha cannot blame lah my mom's indo chinese so i probably got it from her then :D.. good lah i look like chinese :P



dont ask me why my hair is like that.. :P i just woke up.. look at the skin :P. white :D.
so..everything went smoothly UNTIL Farit just had to ask me.. so this is how it went. totally changed my mood ugh..

Farit: eh so how ah u last time told me u like some girl.. how ask already?
me: eh..got rejected lah.if u dont believe ask jack.
Farit: HUH?! Serious?! but i thought..
me: yeah i thought so too,but uh...i dunno whatever lah.
Farit: nvm lah.. theres lots more fishes in the sea..besides it should be easy for you what.
me: i dont want any other fish man.. they can try to get me as much as they want,i just wont.if i wanted to,i would get one like a long time ago....but i dont want to.
Farit: did she had feelings for you or something?
me: maybe?wait.. honestly how am i supposed to know? thats the million dollar question why u ask me?
Farit: well who knows maybe she like you and maybe she just wants to stay it that way. just liking you. not more not less or shes just not ready? you attract girls easily man haha..
me: you suck at making me happy man HAHAHAH
Farit: tell me,how did it happen?

me: well its like this.. i ask then i got a solid NO.. dont take it as rejection this and that.. and poof,now shes not even talking to me. sad ah? its like im trying to say w/e happened,happened lah u know.. and somehow its just not enough.. and i get a feeling that shes angry with me for god knows why. i dont blame her,i blame myself.. she probably is or was angry at me.. and because of ME, shes not talking to me right now. how to feel happy u tell me? atleast talk to me or smth,but now i cant even talk to her,is like so fucking stupid. and the best thing is,i feel fucking dumb at myself because i asked. if i didnt ask,nothing like this should happen. now look when i ask? look at how it changed the whole thing man? shes not even talking to me because i asked. because i asked man. and i think she even blocked me at MSN. i literally destroyed the friendship right there when i asked. and its like im trying so hard to get back at where we started,and somehow someway she just wont let me. i just wished that theres someway to take back all the things that i said for her to feel like that.its not like im purposely trying to make her mad because i get rejected,i wouldnt care at all if i got rejected but she would still be talking to me.AT ALL. i am really stupid for asking man. atleast talk to me,drop me a call,sms or SOMETHING.. she wont even talk to me man!

Farit: no its not,its not stupid that you let it all out or spill your heart out. or not she'll never know. and then someone will probably get her by then. THEN you'll feel so crushed. you know girls man,they say 1 thing they mean another. maybe shes just confused.
me: I just wanna make the point clear,if its a yes then good lah,if its a no then whatever. dont need to frickin avoid me or smth.it just seems so that she doesnt know about that. we were friends for so long man. and i stupidly go ask.. then boom. from friends become foes or something. its not fair man. i just had to do it.. but this is what i get? its not fair man.its like rejection but plus the whole package.. WITH A CHERRY ON TOP.
Farit: chill ah.. just give her time and things will be better.. girls need time to think man. they do. you know that,i know that. :)

went home and listened to songs while walking.. and theres just 1 particular song that made me even sadder.. actually 2 but.. blah. ironically theyre both my fav songs last time :S. had tears in my eyes when i sang along heh.. pathetic eh? its not like im asking for sympathy or smth but its a blog and i feel like i should let it all out i guess.. tears in the eyes but not crying ah! :P..
its sad really,because nobody knows exactly how i feel.. not even her.. hah she doesnt even know this blog exists..& dont jump to conclusions ah cause you guys probably have NO idea what im talking about so its all safe..:) stay that way..it will probably make matters worse if she knew what i wrote here.... right?
she wouldnt uds w/e i said and will probably be angrier at me.I dont wanna get people affected because of me. i dont wanna make the problem worser than it already is.its really really sad that you make just 1 big mistake and theres no way to revert back to the way it was. i'd fake a smile to make everything back to the way it was. she would fucking kill me if she knew that HAHA. confirm. ok ok. i shall talk about polar bears cuz they are so FUZZYWUZZY and theyre CUTE.. except for the big ones.
ok im just being lame now. chalet,D's bday and Outing with Wan Jun(wahaha) coming!! hahah cant wait for that :D :D :D. haha nite ppls.

My December - Linkinpark
"and i just wished that i didnt feel like there was something i missed,and i take back all things that i said to make you feel like that"

Sum 41 - No Reason (i love this song :D)
Chorus
Tell me why can't you see it's not the way?
(so how long has this gone on?I dont see this ending)
When we all fall down it will be too late
(It's too late,we cant change what has now begun)
Why is there no reason we cant change?
(We act like its not right,why are we pretending?)
When we all fall down who will take the blame,what will it take?
(We've been wrong for so long,we've known this all along)


ps: POLAR BEAR CUBS ARE CUTE BUGGERS HAHAHA.. :D I LOOOOVE THEM :D (LOOK AT THAT!! ESP THE 2ND PIC!! SO CUTE!! :DD)

its easier to run

sick,sick,sick AHHHH.. today is so terrible for me.. slept at like 4am and woke up at 3. got high fever,cough,sinus.. supposed to go to dinner now but noooo sick ppl cannot go to dinner.. wth. (-_-).. soo im rotting at home.. alone.

1. nobody to talk to on msn cuz everyone's out or busy or something else..
2. and i cant sing at the window because my nose is blocked and im using my mouth to breathe (and its not raining :P)
   
3. cant play the guitar because the oh-so-fucking-awesome Halim snapped my string and im too lazy to go down and get a new one
4. cant call people because i lost my voice and i sound like someone with throat cancer

it goes on and on... damn it.. :(.. ok im getting pissed so.. better find something to do!I miss my classmates lah! :(.. talked on the phone with wan jun yst until like 330am about sweet sch memories.. like how me and anul would sing like nobody's business in class :P.. oh oh and how that time i sang temperature by sean paul in f&n class with lovely Maria HAHAHA.. and miss watie was like "OMG herrizal?!".. speaking of which Miss watie's wedding coming.. cant wait to see my classmates all again :D
ok so apparently while typing i found my long lost LP Meteora Album :D.. OH! OH! i used to sing this song everyday like 5 years ago? yeah should be thats when meteora went out and uhh....

oh okay now i know why i sang it alot of times a long time ago..heh :(
ok no no no no no no.. i gotta stop being emo.. my previous entry was happy so gotta be happy :D
Gotta remember.. NO EMO MORE SCREAMO (refer to previous entry :P) Nite ppls! Im gonna go find something do :P.

Alright this is the Game Plan!!

Seriously ppls, 'the game plan' is AWESOME :D

Just watched the game plan today and i gotta say.. ITS FRICKIN AWESOME :D
Its quite a touching movie and can make you almost cry (at times..not that i cried or anything.. :P) and the best thing is,theres Dwayne THE ROCK Johnson! you guys seriously need to watch it.. its really really REALLY good. :).. if you guys ever watched Adam Sandler's "big daddy" you'll understand.plus the little girl is really cute too so you guys seriously shouldnt miss it :). eh im no paedophile ah.. funniest part is when the rock's character had like a lisping voice cuz he was allergic to cinnamon.. HAHA. oh oh and the rock does BALLET HAHAHA..
(he seriously looks fucking gay when he does it)

So its deepavali now and public holiday for me yay.. work is a drag.. now i seriously miss school rather than work lol.. and i got no regrets saying that.
Elena,Wan Jun,Mizi,Halim,Zi Wei & Fairuz. Thanks for replying when i was bored to death at work :P :P.. ahh yes.. thanks a million.. and for the rest of you buggers,YOU GUYS SUCK. :P.. ok la i uds why some cannot reply............ but still u guys suck! :P
i tell you my job is so boring,the only good thing is the money and how you can see and make friends with many pretty office girls :D yay! (mostly sarong party girls). nvm nvm i shall strive to be like my bro in law John and be the CEO of some company..then maybe got chance.. lol.. as if..ok la John worked his way to be what he is right now.. from a normal construction worker to a CEO of exxonmobil when hes only 31 so.. IF HE CAN DO IT,SO CAN I! (cheywahh) plus he's handsome so.. no wonder my sis went for him.. good career,good looks,good life.. ok la i wanna be like that when i grow up :)
ugh gotta get shit ready for work tmr.. but on the bright side.. ITS FRIDAY YAY HAHAHAHA.. WEEKENDS WOOOOOOOOOO.. and i never thought i'd be so happy about weekends.

eh ok so..... suddenly yellowcard's song "fighting" is making me emo all over again..NOOOOO..
so better change songs.. lyrics lyrics lyrics..ehhh.. :( HAHAHA YES BFMV.. ATREYU woo
NO EMO more SCREAMO (and it rhymes :D)
nite ppls!

young at heart

so its 530 am now and my work is only like 3 hrs away.. got a new job with bro at DBS Bank at shenton way. 1 hr 7.50 :D :D :D
the only reason im updating right now is because i cant sleep with an empty stomach lol.. so just playing psp while waiting for the frozen food to defrost.. takes forever i tell you.. FASTER LA I WANNA COOK AND EAT ARGH.

ok la yst was fun with my bro at the interview.we acted retarded and like laughed every 1 min for totally no reason at all.. we'd be in the lift and looking at each other.. then out of nowhere we'll laugh. :P. oh and yes many retarded things happened during the form entry..

'are you currently/have been suffering from any serious physical,mental illnesses etc etc'
me: yeah i am. no we both are,WE'RE RETARDED! HAHAHAH
bro: yup,we are. no doubt about that!
**looks at each other and laugh like crazy**

me:"eh bro this all fill out as 'no,no,no,no,no' right?"
bro: no no no no baby no no no no dont lie..
me: WTF?

haha and we were dancing in the elevator when someone comes in.. damn malu lol.. then i think the guy also shocked at what the hell we're doing in the lift lol.. but i guess being retarded is alright! :P ok la ill try to update as soon as possible cuz my work is at 845 to 630 so its tiring..
**oh look mom is awake**
cya ppl im gonna help my mom go make breakfast and then go sleep.. Nite! :)
ps: this new song is awesome.. cuz the guitar solo is fantastic :D
edit: took some photos so ill upload em now.. too tired to give more detail so..
this is what i sing to at night LOL. nice view eh?
Access card for DBS Tower One, :)
playing psp and taking pics while working is cheating right? :P
this is the 'prospector'.. some book thats for shares..its like an equivalent to a maths textbook.. except ADULT version. :P..



OMFG MATHS -_-

tiring :(.

weakness sweet weakness

so its 5:30am now and i cant sleep so im just chatting with halim.. just now or err... YESTERDAY :P went pretty smooth :). felt a lil happy inside.. you'll find out why :P

Arsenal vs Man Utd

2-2

Best match ive seen so far for months..90 mins of attacking football so its awesome..JUST when i thought arsenal was going to lose then at the 91th minute Gallas scored for Arsenal!! haha football is a crazy sport i tell you! :).. and chelsea won 2-0 so its all good :D.. so as i was watching the match i realised something.. Cesc's and Ronaldo's new hairstyle is like same as mine except mine is a little shorter LOL.. and Alexander Hleb looks ALOT like Jim Carrie.Seriously!So arsenal's winning streak is still going on.. never lost for 6 months plus at home!! but eh.. they still cant beat AC Milan's record of 2 year plus never beaten at home :P.. MILAN!!!!! KAKA!!! :D :D

seriously he looks like jim carrie... :P thats Alexander Hleb from Arsenal ppls.

so well.. highlight of the evening was me actually and clearing things up like finally.you know 'things'..eh i just needed time to think OK? everyone knows like how emo i get when things start getting fucked up :P.its kind of like a bittersweet feeling.. Sweet cuz finally get to clear things up but bitter cuz... i dont really know..lol :(. but i uhh........... i dunno.. honestly im a lil confused right now of what i should do so im pretty much not trying to think about it. Lots of questions in my head.. what if's,maybe's etc.. i got a feeling im taking things too fast and caring about the littlest things too much so uhh.. i dunno.. plus i cant see myself getting emo again so........... god i really dunno what the hell im talking about.so blah! whatever lets see how it goes!
(in a way,i have NO idea why im feeling bittersweet but its just like that lah! haha..the sweet is there but the bitter is just somewhere i guess.. ok ok im going crazy.)

ok so STILL.. Ibanez or ESP?! :( i cant make up my mind :(.. yeah and im looking forward to my bday :).. planned out with jack to like celebrate mine and his bday since his bday is near mine.. so chalet or something.. Im PRETTY sure you guys want to sabo me REAL bad.. after uh.. our 'sweet' memories in class.. haha.. **takes cover** i can name a few ppl who would sabo me real bad haha.. raizal,natasya,nafisah,asri,zainul,johnson,elena,pei ying,wan jun etc.. ok thats not a few -_-.. best thing is.. THERES MORE! hahahaha.. ok la i should go to sleep now.. its 6 now and im exhausted.. so,

Nite Ppls! or eh.. Morning! (seriously,i am fucked up :P)